In Case You Missed it: ITVBe Launch Night Recap

ITVBe leapt into life last night as the new channel launched with glitz, glamour, and Joe Swash’s ginger balls.

The impossibly high-cheekboned Peter Andre and Jamelia welcomed us to ITVBe with a launch show, which tantalised us with glimpses of what’s to come.

The Real Housewives of Cheshire, Ladies of London, Celebrity Dinner Date and, of course, The Only Way is Essex – we were introduced to and reacquainted with a whole host of unfathomably beautiful people and their real lives.

As Peter Andre explained: “ITVBe is a brand new channel bringing you the ultimate in glamour and entertainment.”

Entertainment really doesn’t get any better than witnessing Tamara Ecclestone struggle with the concepts of bread and toast, in Seven Days With – a week behind the doors of our favourite celebrity couples.

If you haven’t seen this clip already, it’s one of the finest comedy moments of all time. “So, before you toast it, toast is bread?”…

We were reminded of the 10 golden rules of being a Real Housewife… the mansions; the cars; the air kiss; the wardrobe; the designer dog; the staff; the parties; the face; the Body; and most thrilling of all, the catfights…

Throughout the show we witnessed Joe Swash’s hilarious and occasionally tragic attempts to woo women, on Celebrity Dinner Date, as he set out with the admirably high standards of wanting to find someone who’s ‘not annoying’. If only he had chosen the lovely blonde Emily who had absolutely no idea who Joe was. But no – he went for the woman with the ginger balls. You had to be there.

We met the Ladies of London – the British and American glamour set with very different views. Apparently the Brits ‘have a heart of coal’ and the Americans are ‘very emotional’. You’ll be delighted to know that both sides can dish out the dirt in equal measure.

Then we were introduced to the latest in an illustrious line of Real Housewives – The Real Housewives of Cheshire. This will be hitting our screens early next year and it promises to be spectacular.

We met Tanya, a self-confessed ‘nutter’ who is married to a footballer. There was Leanne, who insisted: “I’m not a confrontational person”. Then there’s Lauren “the party girl of Cheshire” who admitted: “I’ve done a really good job of doing nothing”.

Sparks are clearly set to fly with Magali, who revealed: “I’m very feisty and if you lie about me I grab you”; and Ampika, who told us: “I’m a bit of a crazy personality, I’m a bit outspoken.” Finally we met the mysterious Dawn, who is “hard on the outside and soft on the inside”.

And of course, we welcomed back the cast of TOWIE, fresh off the plane from Ibiza… with a quick update for those of you who couldn’t remember who had been kissing who. Although things may already have moved on, with Jamelia being invited by Arg to take part in a love triangle. Watch this space.

 

Words by: Jenny Cornish
Tags: